I ate too much internet today.
Jesus Fucking Christ - I feel like throwing up. And crying. I want to curl up in the corner, and just rock back and forth.
Way too much internet.
First there was the story of Kiko, the deaf dog who took a bullet to the head for his owner.
An aged deaf hero dog in need of adoption?
Fuck.
And then the soul crusher. Syria.
I'll be honest. I have no idea what's going on in Syria. None. I'm just trying to get my kids to school on time and deal with a back problem.
But then I see this picture.
Among others. And my heart shatters into a billion pieces.
I've got a five year old and a two year old. They're both healthy and beautiful. Loved. They are innocents, and innocence. They are so sweet and good in their tiny people clothes and their little voices. I love them like air. I can't exist without breathing them in.
Like any parent.
These Syrian refugees are trying to escape war. Not higher property taxes, or a terrible commute to work. War. They're trying to give their kids a better life.
Like any parent.
People will tell you your life changes when you become a parent, but they don't tell you how.
Here's how:
Before kids when you watch a TV show or a movie in which something bad happens to a child, you think, "Oh, ok, this a plot device. It's just furthering the story." When you're a parent, "WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED TO THAT CHILD? OH MY GOD, WHAT ABOUT THAT CHILD?! I'M GOING TO WRITE A GODDAMN LETTER TO NBC IF THIS IS NOT RESOLVED PROPERLY!!!"
So when you see a three year old boy lying dead on the shore with his face in the sand and he's wearing the same tiny people clothes you get at the Gap, it's YOUR child. YOUR heart shatters into a billion pieces.
I can't even imagine. Rather, I don't want to. Of course, you don't have to be a parent to feel the pain and horror. Just human.
Fuck.
And then I get to Alissa Silva, a mom. She's made a video about her son Mason. It's one of those videos where the person just holds up cards.
But Alissa is giving Meryl Streep a real run for her money. Her performance is nuanced and subtle. It's Oscar worthy. And whatever is left of my heart is pulverized into a mush. I'm staring into my phone, but it's hard to see because my eyes are welling up.
Fuck.
Fuck.
Too much goddamn internet today.
Mighty Mutts - http://www.mightymutts.org/kiko.html
UN Refugees - http://www.unrefugees.org/where-we-work/syria/
How to help Syrian (and other) refugees - https://jilliancyork.com/2015/09/02/new-for-2015-how-to-help-syrian-and-iraqi-refugees/
St Baldrick's - https://www.stbaldricks.org/fundraisers/BabyMason
